When your husband travels...

I am SO not used to this....him being gone. For the first few months I just sulked. I'll be honest. I thought to myself "How can one be so incredibly thankful for this job, and so upset about it all at the same time!?" I even threatened to fill out an application for him at Lowes'. :) But truth be told, he loves his job. I love his job. I just haven't made real good friends with this thing called "traveling". As a child I had a dad who was home. A LOT. He could come home for lunch, or dinner, or to go golfing, or to surprise my mom with roses. His office was only 5 minutes away. He took a lot of trips, but most of them were just for fun. He never really had to be away that much for work. That's what I'm used to. If you had told me 10 years ago that at this point in my life I'd be married, have had 3 c-sections, living in a townhouse with practically no yard, and have a husband who has to travel for work I do believe you would've seen my chin hit the floor. Never would've guessed. :) But God has a serious sense of humor, and apparently this is what He has chosen for us at this stage of the game. So before he left for this most recent trip, I spent an hour in bed just crying. I was nervous and upset and for the first time I understood why. I associate a dad who travels with one who never comes home. My dad boarded that plane on August 8th, 2003 for a golfing trip. He never returned. I told Seth that I fully expect that sooner or later, eventually, there will be a trip in which he never returns. It's the only thing I know. Another reason why I always dreaded his trips was because I felt like life had to be put on hold. I couldn't have fun, or get a break, or exercise, or see friends, or watch a movie. I would just timidly go throughout my day, awaiting the next disaster....a water pipe bursts, I get the stomach flu, a kid breaks their leg, I get raped in my bed with a gun held to my head. :) You know, just the normal stuff a mom worries about! So here was our conclusion: #1, trust the Lord. Duh. What did you expect? Sip on mimosa's every night? Hehe... #2, find fun things to do while he's gone. I hated his trips because it meant I had to go a whole week without exercising. He always watched the kids so I could go to the gym, or go to the barn, or go for a walk. We solved this solution by purchasing a treadmill. I've gotta say, it's been wonderful! We've also been able to implement more ideas, such as....get out of the house from 5-7 every evening. These are the worse hours every day, ESPECIALLY when he's not here. So now during naptime I pack snacks and drinks and activities. They all wake up around 4, they get a drink, get dressed, and then we are gone! The mall....the library.....the park.....church.....Target....you name it, we go there. It makes those evening hours go by SO much faster. By the time we get home they are all ready for baths, a HUGE snack (since they didn't have much of a dinner), watch a movie, read a book, and then to bed they go! I'm also not left with a kitchen full of dirty dishes because I never had to actually "make dinner". It's truly a win-win. :) We also don't talk about daddy being away. They know he's working. They know he's not coming home for dinner. But we don't just sit around and say "well, today daddy is in Vermont and we won't see him for another 4 days...." :) My husband cannot give 100% of himself at work if he knows we are all at home bawling our eyes out and counting the minutes down, OR if I'm calling every 20 minutes just to check in. :) So we've made changes. So far, so good. Who knows what the future holds. He may not be traveling for the rest of his life. But what if this is what God wants him to do until he's 60? Do I want to look back and say that for 15 weeks out of every year we sat around on our heinies and watched the world pass us by until he walked in the door again? Not a chance! I still get scared...and bored......and lonely. I have little things that I do that are rediculous. Like don't do laundry in the evening because I don't want to have to walk by myself to the basement to put it in the dryer. I also keep the gun within reaching distance. :) Heaven forbid if someone ever plays a trick on me. Shoot first, ask questions later is my moto. :) ANYWAY, these things have helped me. Still learning....but doing better. :)