Trouble letting go....

I'm a sentimental girl. Not sure when that all started to take place, but as far back as I remember, I don't let things go very quickly. You might say something that hurts or offends, and I keep replaying it in my mind for ages and ages. God is really working in my heart in the area of letting go. I love hoarding. No, I am in love with hoarding. I hoard old cards, hurtful words, worn jammies, pictures, my baby's clothing. I hoard experiences, regrets, and dreams unfulfilled. I don't get over things easily. We've run out of room in our home. Seriously. It got to the point where we literally could not take one step into the garage. We've been dreaming of moving. Trying to move. But we can't. We don't really have to move, but we would if we didn't get rid of a few things. This weekend I bit the bullet and helped Seth load the minivan top to bottom, front to back, with our precious belongings. Bit by bit, piece by piece, I felt like I was throwing away my childhood. I had kept posters from 1995 with Olympic equestrians on them that used to hang in my bedroom. Riding helmets that were cracked from one too many falls. The cozy little vibrator seat that all 3 of my babies have slept in. Throw pillows, blankets, place mats, candle holders. I had no intention of ever using this stuff again. But I wanted it there in case I felt the need to smell it, touch it, or look at it again. I didn't want the memory to die. I have 2 entire drawers full of cassette tapes. They used to be my parents. They were played every single day of my entire childhood. I can pop one in and instantly be brought back to Kool-Aid, homeschooling, mom baking cookies, dad cleaning out the basement. I don't know why, but I feel like if I get rid of them, I'm also getting rid of the memory. It's like my safe haven. I want it all there....just in case. But we've hit a road block. I'm not living in the present. These boxes of treasured memorabilia are taking over our home. It's preventing extra room for my kids, for my hubby's projects, for my own sanity. So we packed up the van, and he drove it all away. Forever. It's gone. (well, not all of it. I secretly kept the cassette tapes!) I am constantly searching for a way to go back. Is this God's plan? I don't think so. Don't I realize that our family would be so much less stressed and have so much more room for fun new things that fit what our family needs for RIGHT NOW if I just start living for today and the future of our kids!?!? Absolutely! But it's still hard. I guess it will always be a learning process for me. But I'm learning.....